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Week 7 Power Rankings

ITS GETTING CRAZY OUT DER!!!

Two Studs lose and two Dud's win.

Fisters Cruise and Buttlicks lose.

Blanco's win and Elephants Try again.

***SPECIAL PICTURE EDITION***WEEK 7 POWER RANKINGS

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Mid-Week Update

Taking a look at the games going on this week the most surprising result so far is the whooping Elk Musk Poole and the Predators are putting on Playboy owner Pearce McKinley's HBT's. The HBT's have had some fortunate luck this season racking up 3 wins despite scoring the fewest amount of points.

BWKNBNC has learned that GM Pearce McKinley is not happy with his ball club and may be looking to shake things up with a blockbuster trade, he is rumored to be looking for an entire infielder or "Basically just anyone with a pulse" and some pitching depth.

The Elephants and Brosmers are all locked up in the 160's at this point and each team is desperate for a win. I predict a Brosmers victory that will keep GM Pooch McGee out of the doghouse for at least another week.

The Cano's seem to have taken a solid lead over the Crocs today but anything could happen with each team still having 7 starters left. The Crocs are desperate for a win and if they get close enough they may just get ahold and take the Cano's under with a couple barrel rolls.

Rebel Yell has a 20pt lead over the Blanco's right now and should cruise to an easy victory. Despite being #2 in the latest power ranking Yell GM Ben Keck is still convinced his team can get better. Rumors place him in Salt Lake City last night talking to Blanco's GM Cheese Horner about a possible trade after this week.

Last but not least we have the Fisters continuing to tear the league a new asshole as they are currently up 60 points on the slumping buttlicks.


There are good ships and bad ships, there are ships that sail the sea, but the best ship is a championship, and may it ever.

2010 Rebel Yell
2011 Paddle Your Own Cano
2012 KC Brosmers

Week 6 Power Rankings

WEEK 6 POWER RANKINGS

Check back later tonight for a "Game of the Week" breakdown of the Fisters Vs Buttlicks matchup.

Here is this week’s Power Rankings

 "STUD'S"

1. Paddle Your Own Cano (4-1) - Sven Murphy

First loss of the Year and it was not pretty losing by 77. Should get back on track against the crocs this week according to GM Sven Murphy "The predators are a good team and we cant expect to win all 162 games. I'm not worried about the clubhouse. Once Sven Strasburg starts getting run support look out, this staff could be unstoppable. No comment about the Clay Bucholz foreign substance allegations."

2. Rebel Yell (4-1) – Ben “10 for 10” Keck

League High 459 pts last week manager and Benjamin Keck seems to have his team hitting on all cylinders. 

When asked if there was anyway his team could improve he shot back "Who says we won't add some Nitro's Oxide to the engine in the form of a certifiable STUD starting pitcher? Talks have been underway with a couple of different clubs and it looks like something could happen soon"

"PUD'S"

Their seems to be a little separation in Pud section now with the Buttlicks and the Predators a step above the rest. If the scorching hot Elephants and Fisters keep winning they will be in the upper tier as well.

3. Billy Buttlicks (3-2) - Schoon McGoon

The buttlicks put up a season high 426 pts last week as they cruised to an easy W  against the reeling Brosmers. Trumbo was dropping Trumbombs all week on his way to putting up 35 points. They will need that kind of production again when they play the Scorching Hot Furbush Fisters this week..

  

4. Prairie Village Predators (3-2) – Elk Musk Poole

Big W vs the Cano's despite only starting 7 pitchers due to weather delays however GM Harripants Poole was "Not surprised by the outcome, inclement weather hindered us a bit but at the end of the day it was the Cano's that found themselves up the crick with no paddle."

The predators have a quintuplet of Stud pitchers(King Felix, Verlander, Young STUD Matt Harvey and Masterson), rumor has it any one of them could be on the trading block looking to add more depth to his staff.

5. Furbush Fisters (2-3) – Juice Christine

HE'S HEATING UP, 412 points last week as the Fisters cruised past the Blanco's. They face a tough task this week against the buttlicks but claim the mood of the clubhouse has shifted thanks to a new clubhouse rule outlawing the game "Grabass"

When asked about his teams turnaround GM Juice Christine explained "We have felt good about our team since the draft so we figured it was only a matter of time before out players stopped playing grab ass and starting playing some fucking baseball."

6.Team Elephant (2-3) – Wayne Walker 

2 straight wins despite getting ass raped in a trade, refusing to speak to the press, seems to be working.

7. Los Gringo's Blanco's (2-3) – Cheese Horner

The Blanco's may have won the acquisition battle this week but they put up a league low 254 points on the field. Cheese Horner is "excited to see his new stud(Cain) on the bump" and let us in on a "secret closed meeting called by veterans Tulo and Moore to set things straight.

8. Hidden Ball Tricks (3-2) – Blouse McKinney

The HBT's have another bad performance putting up a measly 255 pts. Despite having 3 wins under their belt the HBT's are reeling and have indicated that bumgarner is on the block but they are "conflicted about trading the future of their ball club"

DUD'S

Two DUD'S leave the cellar but 2 DUD'S take their place. Would not surprise me one bit to see a fire sale from either of these teams in the upcoming weeks.

9. KC Brosmers (1-4) – Pooch Murphy

Measly 288 pts last week and the fans have shown their disgust with GM Pooch Murphy by burning bags of Kibbles N Bits outside his home. If things don't get fixed quick the Brosmer Fans are in for a long season..

10. Crocs In Florida (1-4)- Allan Baird

Crocs GM Allan Baird has chalked up his teams recent woes to "Drinking beer and eating fried chicken in the club house". He hopes to turn the team around with the signing of FA Andy Pettite but things dont get easier this week when the Cano's come to town.

2012 Martin Presentation

Ben Ji 
Overland Park KS

                                                  Taints GM Sven Murphy Poses with the martin

The 2012 Martin presentation took place today during a meat orgy at Oklahoma Joes BBQ Paradise in KCK. The Martin was presented to Taints GM Sven Murphy by the 2011 Champion Turrible Tabernacle.

We caught up with Sven after the presentation and asked him about his chances of repeating as champion, according to Sven "The Taint's have 99 problems but lack of championships ain't one"